A Note on Nate

We had our usual 6 month retinal specialist appointment last Friday.  Emma is doing awesome.  Annika was OK.  Holding her own, we think.  For Nate, though, things had gotten bad.  Really bad.

I honestly wasn't paying attention to how badly he did at his eye exam because the previous week his glasses had fallen apart. I've actually never seen anything like it.  On one Sunday both of his ear pieces fell off within hours of each other.  We found a pair of back-up glasses from last year.  But I dilly-dallied about getting the replacement as I dealt with the Christmas holidays.  I had, finally, begun the process of getting replacements when we had our appointment.  But the replacements weren't in.  So Nate was not only reading the chart through dirty glasses--a constant in his life, but also with the wrong prescription.

I really didn't think anything of it when his test went really wrong.  I didn't even pay attention to how he scored.  Did he get a 20/40 or a 20/50?  Couldn't tell you.  I just waved it off and told them about the glasses.

Then we got the imaging done.  And I saw the thing I never wanted to see.  One "slice" of Nate's imaging in his left eye looks EXACTLY like Emma's right eye--her blind eye.  There it was.  This bulb like bulge under Nate's retina with a bit of something floating in it.  It is likely that the "something" is some kind of fibroid or calcification or whatever it is that filled Emma's bulb shaped bulge and made her go blind.

Here I sit with another 11-year-old at risk of going blind.  We've increased Nathan's meds.  Again.  The doctor mentioned doing shots. Possibly.  Remembering that it didn't help Emma.  There's a lot a shoulder shrugging.  We're guessing.  And hoping.

We've adjusted Nate's meds and we'll wait 2 months to see what that will do.  Sometimes I think about if it doesn't work.  Do we do the shots in the good eye to try to save it?  Or in the bad eye before he goes blind?  Or (horror) do we do both?  Emma had only one eye to save, so it was a no brainer.  But Nate's case is more complicated.

And so I go the rounds.  Should I try to get Xanax and bring it with me that day?  Is he brave enough to do both eyes?  Can I prep him well enough to go through the pain and discomfort of doing one eye and have him sit do to the other?  If not, (or just in case not) which eye do we start with?

Meanwhile, I posted on Facebook about our quandary and had an outpouring of support.  And I FELT it.  The love.  The prayers.  So many people who are struggling with their own problems and issues praying for us.  When, really, it's not all that bad.  But I'm grateful.  And humbled.

And if you're the praying sort, will you pray for Nate?  He could use it.

The Art of Doing Nothing

I know people who spend Christmas day in their jammies watching movies and playing with the new toys.  We aren't those kind of people.

We bounce around Christmas Day from my family to Wendell's family to my grandma's.  It hit me most when my aunt leaned over to me at Grandma's and said, "How many Christmas' have you had today."

"Four," I answered.

I don't begrudge it at all.  But because of the busyness of the day yesterday, we're doing nothing today.  Sleeping in.  Reading books. Watching movies.  Playing with friends.  It can be anything.

The hardest thing about doing nothing is reminding myself not to check on my business accounts, email or do anything that furthers my business today.

This is good.  To unplug and relax.  Now for a nap and making some dinner.

Annika (7) Relaxing with her dolls. 

Making a Difference

Becoming a Social Media Manager has been an awesome experience.  Not only do I get to help clients expand their social reach, tell their story and increase sales, but I get paid to do it.  Doing consulting work, I set my own schedule, work while the kids are in school and strengthen my own talents.  It has been a lot of fun!  I definitely get up everyday excited to "go" to work.

My experience and work for several clients led to an invitation to be on the advisory board of a foundation:  The Healing Through Christ Foundation. I run their Facebook and Pinterest pages and advise them on their website, blogging and more.

The Healing Through Christ Foundation provides educational resources for families that have been affected by pornography addiction. Their flagship product is a 12 Step manual designed for family members of those who struggle with addiction.

My work with Healing Through Christ has earned me offer to blog for Women for Decency--one of the leaders in the fight against pornography.  After brainstorming with board members of the foundation, we decided that our first blog posts will each feature information about a step from their 12 Step Workbook.

I would love to share some of the posts I've written for Women for Decency.  Two board members look over my writing and edit my work so it truly represents what they are trying to do. Pornography addiction has become an overwhelmingly common problem.  While there are many resources for addicts (though we need still more),  resources for family members are limited.

Working for and with the Healing Through Christ Foundation has been transformative for me.  Although I enjoy all the work I do for all my
clients, my work with Healing Through Christ is making a difference.  I get to connect people who are hurting to resources that will help them.  I think often of the words of a hymn, "Have I done any good in the world today?  Have I helped anyone in need?"  When I'm doing work at Healing Through Christ, I can answer those questions with an unequivocal, "YES!"